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If I was a guy for a day,

thecolorplaid:

I would:

• Masturbate.
• Hug a girl to see if it’s true that they can feel their boobs.
• Walk around the house naked.
• Pee behind a building.
• Ask someone to kick me in the balls to see how painful some boys say it hurts.
• Yell at girls at the mall saying, “CAN I HOLLA FOR A DOLLA?”
• Stare at my penis. 
• Get a blowjob.

you seem to think that getting a blowjob is easy

it is not

(Source: emikattt, via nerdypartyman)

(Source: billfuckinghader, via nerdypartyman)

(Source: teddyaltman, via kanyewesticle)

absolutextrema:

never change kanye

never change

(Source: jimmyconways, via pizza)

ejacutastic:

i have childhood memories that i am not 100% sure actually happened or if i dreamed them i really do not know

(via pizza)

What I think when kids in my class read

• That’s a PERIOD, NOT A COMMA
• That’s a COMMA, NOT A PERIOD
• Why the hell can’t you pronounce that word?
• THE TEACHER JUST CORRECTED YOU WHY’D YOU GET IT WRONG AGAIN?!?!?!
• Can I sleep?
• If you can’t read, why’d you raise your hand?
• You can’t pronounce THAT word?
• WHAT THE HELL
• The fuck you like long ass paragraphs for
• My skin’s crawling
• Oh god not him, his voice sounds like a dying nail on a dying chalkboard
• You skipped a line
• LOL what was that?
• I don’t even. 

(Source: youcanbethecaptain, via pizza)

freddybenson:

i cant believe burger king bought tumblr

(via kanyewesticle)

kawaiipeculier:

*tosses panties on stage at a wiggles concert*

(via kanyewesticle)